Hey! I'm David, and I’d love to make your dreams come true.
I can't do that though, so you'll have to settle for the following column of semi-relevant text about myself.
I don't actually have much to say about myself. I find people often call me ‘amusing’, which is more or less something you’d call a monkey that’s peeing in its own mouth. Not that that’s bad; monkeys that people find amusing get bundles of the good kind of bananas.
I've been writing since ages too tender to describe, and I can’t tell you how good I was or how good I’ve become, but I can tell you this: you may like my words. You may indeed.
And what kind of guarantee is that? Well, it ain’t. I’m going to continue writing this column of text, and if you find yourself enjoying it mildly, you go on ahead and pick up your mouse, touchpad or additional technology my grandparents don’t understand and give me a press.
Now, the degrees and diplomas I have in possession go on forever. Which is to say: they are nonexistent. But I’ve written for several publications, I consider myself fairly talented, and if you don't like the milk I provide, I’ll strain my teat until you’re satisfied with the merchandise.
(Which is to say, to the literally challenged, I’ll revise and edit until your thumb is wholeheartedly up)
So, in conclusion…
- Free revisions.
- Experienced with all types of writing, samples upon request (specializing in honest and humorous writing).
- Try me with a test project.
Send me a message, let's talk.